The Snoozeletter @ s.9TimeZones.com

 
Ring Of Fire. 

Sunday, May 20, 2012: a "ring of fire" annular solar eclipse is coming to OR, CA, NV, UT, AZ, CO, NM, TX. It's the first one in the USA in almost 18 years.

Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YX2blo1eRk

More details: http://science.nasa.gov/science-news/science-at-nasa/2012/27jan_annulareclipse/

PDF map: http://eclipse.gsfc.nasa.gov/OH/OHfigures/OH2012-Fig02.pdf
 
Thank you! More, please?

ANNIE (Malin Akerman): About a year ago, I was in this cab, and the cab driver - this Indian guy - started telling me... he started telling me all sorts of stuff. He was just looking at me in the rear-view mirror and he said, "Bliss. Bliss is your birthright." And I was like, "Uh... 45th and Madison?" And he said, "You have great potential in this lifetime. The key to your life is gratitude. You do not give enough thanks." And I said, "Well, how do I do that?" And he said, "Simple! Say 'thank you.'" And I said, "Well, when?" And he said, "All the time! Like now." And he said that after I say "thank you," I should say, "more please."

--happythankyoumoreplease, by writer/director/star Josh Radnor ("Ted Mosby" on How I Met Your Mother)

happythankyoumoreplease

Starz - Netflix - Amazon - IMDb - Facebook
 
Blake sayeth.

Blake would say, "The naked woman's body is a portion of eternity too great for the eye of man." (Iron John: A Book About Men, by Robert Bly, 1990)

Blake actually said:

"The roaring of lions, the howling of wolves, the raging of the stormy sea, and the destructive sword, are portions of eternity too great for the eye of man." (The Marriage of Heaven and Hell, by William Blake, 1793)
 
Funniest videos about Facebook.

Facebook Manners And You:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iROYzrm5SBM

The Social Network Teaser 3 (Spoof):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5o4UzfZsZI

10 Reasons Why We Hate Facebook:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flRg9Q1d3kY

Robert Frost Checks His Facebook Account:
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/7b33dbb0bf

R U F*cking Kidding Me? (Facebook Song) [lyrics]:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7MuwPlOiNQ
 
NEWS FLASH:

Archaeologists have discovered the Mayan Calendar, Part Deux.
It starts in 2012, and even includes the last three months of 2011.

Bizarro
 
Who's On First? 

--Abbott & Costello [text] [mp3] [Wikipedia]

ABBOTT: Well, Costello, I'm going to New York with you. Bucky Harris, the Yankees' manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.

COSTELLO: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.

ABBOTT: I certainly do.

COSTELLO: Well you know, I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.

ABBOTT: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ballplayers nowadays very peculiar names.

COSTELLO: You mean funny names?

ABBOTT: Strange names, pet names... like Dizzy Dean...

COSTELLO: ...his brother Daffy...

ABBOTT: ...Daffy Dean...

COSTELLO: ...and their French cousin.

ABBOTT: French?

COSTELLO: Goofay.

ABBOTT: Goofay Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...

COSTELLO: That's what I want to find out.

ABBOTT: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.

COSTELLO: Are you the manager?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: You gonna be the coach too?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: And you don't know the fellows' names.

ABBOTT: Well I should.

COSTELLO: Well then who's on first?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: I mean the fellow's name?

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: The guy on first.

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: The first baseman.

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: The guy playing...

ABBOTT: Who is on first!

COSTELLO: I'm asking you who's on first?

ABBOTT: That's the man's name.

COSTELLO: That's who's name?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: Well go ahead and tell me.

ABBOTT: That's it.

COSTELLO: That's who?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO (pause): Look, you got a first baseman?

ABBOTT: Certainly.

COSTELLO: Who's playing first?

ABBOTT: That's right.

COSTELLO: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?

ABBOTT: Every dollar of it.

COSTELLO: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: The guy that gets...

ABBOTT: That's it.

COSTELLO: ...who gets the money...

ABBOTT: He does, every dollar of it. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.

COSTELLO: Who's wife?

ABBOTT: Yes. (pause) What's wrong with that?

COSTELLO: I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: The guy...

ABBOTT: Who.

COSTELLO: How does he sign...

ABBOTT: That's how he signs it.

COSTELLO: Who?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO (pause): All I'm trying to find out is what's the guy's name on first base.

ABBOTT: No. What is on second base.

COSTELLO: I'm not asking you who's on second.

ABBOTT: Who's on first.

COSTELLO: One base at a time!

ABBOTT: Well, don't change the players around.

COSTELLO: I'm not changing nobody!

ABBOTT: Take it easy, buddy.

COSTELLO: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?

ABBOTT: That's right.

COSTELLO: Okay.

ABBOTT: Alright.

COSTELLO (pause): What's the guy's name on first base?

ABBOTT: No. What is on second.

COSTELLO: I'm not asking you who's on second.

ABBOTT: Who's on first.

COSTELLO: I don't know.

ABBOTT: He's on third. We're not talking about him.

COSTELLO: Now how did I get on third base?

ABBOTT: Why you mentioned his name.

COSTELLO: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?

ABBOTT: No. Who's playing first.

COSTELLO: What's on base?

ABBOTT: What's on second.

COSTELLO: I don't know.

ABBOTT: He's on third.

COSTELLO: There I go, back on third again! (pause) Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.

ABBOTT: Alright, what do you want to know?

COSTELLO: Now who's playing third base?

ABBOTT: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?

COSTELLO: What am I putting on third?

ABBOTT: No. What is on second.

COSTELLO: You don't want who on second?

ABBOTT: Who is on first.

COSTELLO: I don't know.

ABBOTT/COSTELLO (together): Third base!

COSTELLO (pause): Look, you got an outfield?

ABBOTT: Sure.

COSTELLO: The left fielder's name?

ABBOTT: Why.

COSTELLO: I just thought I'd ask you.

ABBOTT: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.

COSTELLO: Then tell me who's playing left field.

ABBOTT: Who's playing first.

COSTELLO: I'm not... stay out of the infield!! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?

ABBOTT: No, What is on second.

COSTELLO: I'm not asking you who's on second.

ABBOTT: Who's on first!

COSTELLO: I don't know.

ABBOTT/COSTELLO (together): Third base!

COSTELLO (pause): The left fielder's name?

ABBOTT: Why.

COSTELLO: Because!

ABBOTT: Oh, he's center field.

COSTELLO (pause): Look, You got a pitcher on this team?

ABBOTT: Sure.

COSTELLO: The pitcher's name?

ABBOTT: Tomorrow.

COSTELLO: You don't want to tell me today?

ABBOTT: I'm telling you now.

COSTELLO: Then go ahead.

ABBOTT: Tomorrow!

COSTELLO: What time?

ABBOTT: What time what?

COSTELLO: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?

ABBOTT: Now listen. Who is not pitching.

COSTELLO: I'll break your arm if you say who's on first!! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?

ABBOTT: What's on second.

COSTELLO: I don't know.

ABBOTT/COSTELLO (together): Third base!

COSTELLO (pause): Got a catcher?

ABBOTT: Certainly.

COSTELLO: The catcher's name?

ABBOTT: Today.

COSTELLO: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.

ABBOTT: Now you've got it.

COSTELLO: All we got is a couple of days on the team. (pause) You know, I'm a catcher too.

ABBOTT: So they tell me.

COSTELLO: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching. Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?

ABBOTT: Now that's the first thing you've said right.

COSTELLO: I don't even know what I'm talking about!

ABBOTT (pause): That's all you have to do.

COSTELLO: Is to throw the ball to first base?

ABBOTT: Yes!

COSTELLO: Now who's got it?

ABBOTT: Naturally.

COSTELLO (pause): Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?

ABBOTT: Naturally.

COSTELLO: Who?

ABBOTT: Naturally.

COSTELLO: Naturally?

ABBOTT: Naturally.

COSTELLO: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.

ABBOTT: No you don't. You throw the ball to Who.

COSTELLO: Naturally.

ABBOTT: That's different.

COSTELLO: That's what I said.

ABBOTT: You're not saying it...

COSTELLO: I throw the ball to Naturally.

ABBOTT: You throw it to Who.

COSTELLO: Naturally.

ABBOTT: That's it.

COSTELLO: That's what I said!

ABBOTT: You ask me.

COSTELLO: I throw the ball to who?

ABBOTT: Naturally.

COSTELLO: Now you ask me.

ABBOTT: You throw the ball to Who?

COSTELLO: Naturally.

ABBOTT: That's it.

COSTELLO: Same as you! Same as YOU!! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow. Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!

ABBOTT: What?

COSTELLO: I said I don't give a darn!

ABBOTT: Oh, that's our shortstop.

COSTELLO: (screams)